So Western Washington is about to get hit with a snowpocalypse. And people in places like Michigan and New Hampshire will point and laugh, but really, when you aren’t equipped for winter and have lots of steep hills, a little snow makes a fairly big problem. Right now people may be doing foolish things like stocking up on milk and dry cereal, but here’s what you really need to do to get ready for being snowed in when you live here:

1. Find heavy wool socks to wear under your Birkenstocks.

2. Locate extra quilts and blankets so when the heat goes out and temperatures plunge to 32F, you can stay warm.

3. Make sure your kids’ devices have fresh batteries in them/and or are fully charged.

4. Make sure YOUR devices have fresh batteries/full charge. You know which ones matter most to you.

5. This includes your cell phone, so when the phone lines go down you can tweet about it.

6. Make lots of notes so you can tell posterity about the time it snowed in Seattle/Port Townsend/Other Western Wa locale where snow is something you drive to a mountain to ski on, not something you actually live with.

7. Download lots of ebooks to read on the fully charged device of your choice. Because Whispernet doesn’t work even if you aim it directly at Amazon’s headquarters when there’s no power or internet.

8. Cursing Amazon doesn’t help. Even if you do it on foot and in person.

9. There are always print books and those don’t require charging.

10. Send your kids outside to play in the snow while you read. They won’t get to do it again until the next time you drive up to Hurricane Ridge/Mount Rainier/other favorite place to be a snow tourist. And you won’t have to cover anything when they ask what you’re reading.